I think I’m falling in Love with these…
So far, my favourite shop in the UK is Oasis.
It is a little pricey for me so I only shop at their sale section. But really, if their clothes were food, I’d be salivating all over them!!!
I love Oasis because I like how feminine and elegant it is. Yet, it always has a twist to it. I also love their range of colours!
Here are some of the dresses I am ABSOLUTELLY ooh-ing and aaah-ing all over right now.
And So it Happens…
Why????
WHY do things like that ALWAYS happen to me????
Last Friday, had a night out with my Econs masters coursemates. Headed to a pub to chat and have drinks. And after that, decided to head to a student club called the Queen of Hearts. I was so grossly underdressed. Having rocked up in only my supre leggings and hoodie. But we just decided to head over there anyways.
So when we got in, Joey, my Brit friend from Newcastle headed inside first and me next. It was so crowded. The rest, for some reason got held back. So it was only me trailing Joey who was heading to the bar to meet his housemate. So when he finally did, I just stood there slightly behind him, and stared at him chat with his housemate while waiting for him.
Suddenly, his housemate looks at me, gives me this weird disenchanted smile, and starts whispering to Joey (while looking at me) not rather obscurely.
Right after, Joey just BURSTS OUT laughing.
What did his housemate whisper?
“JOEY! I THINK THAT GIRL IS FOLLOWING YOU!!!!”
Our souls are not hungry for fame, comfort, wealth, or power. Those rewards create almost as many problems as they solve. Our souls are hungry for meaning, for the sense that we have figured out how to live so that our lives matter, so that the world will at least be a little bit different for our having passed through it.
- Harold Kushner, American Rabbi
What I’m wondering now, I’ve had it in my 19 year old self.
One of the issue that seemingly has been playing in my head is the fact that I pressurize myself to achieve and accomplish.
I surprise even myself the fact that I am performance orientated. I derived satisfaction from me getting things done, accomplishing things, doing things and seeing results for my hard work.
And when I don’t. I berate myself. I beat myself up. In my own mind, I torture myself with my own whippings of self-disapproval.
And this.is.driving.me.insane.
I know this is not sustainable. And yet, I keep thinking I’m not trying hard enough. Not pushing myself hard enough. Not doing more enough.
I was looking through my old online journal and was surprised to stumble upon these two posts:
Thursday, June 15, 2006
Nothing less than big.
Or that talent doesn’t have much of a significant role in your life.
Or that your world ain’t ending despite the fact the scores on your love life currently equates zero. For the last 19 years of your life. In which you’re 19.
Or whatever else.
Yeah, it doesn’t matter.
Because I for one horrifyingly lack in all departments that highly requires a significant amount of something which actually matters.
Urgh.
Gosh. It’s so tough. And I have to be strong. Tell myself I’m strong. Bite my lips and hold back my tears because I’m ’strong’.
But how long can I last?
How long can I keep fighting before I just break down?
I feel as if I’m in a quicksand and there I am struggling hard to keep myself up. Pushing, kicking, fighting to reach the top and it just swallows me up. I know I’m supposed to just relax. But I can’t.
I dunno what to feel. I know there’s nothing much I should worry about. But if there’s something about me that needs to be known. I can’t live in the moment. I live for the future. And so everything I think about concerns primarily the future. And if my future currently looks everything equal to bleak, then what am I supposed to think?
I just wanna go to sleep and lay my head on my pillow and know that I’d have nothing less than big in return.Wednesday, June 14, 2006
Intolerable Cruelty
You know, I’ve been strugling with this issue of always having to win, or achieve a lot of things, thinking that only with these achievements, I’d be happy.
And in the movie, Miles is a lawyer with a winning streak in divorce cases and Marilyn seeks easy fortune in marrying “silly” rich men to exploit money from them.
And the end of the day, they both learned that despite all the money or cases they can win, without no one to share their “happiness” with, they’re not happy.
And there is this character in the movie as well that kind of scared me. It’s this old lawyer, who has won many achievements, has the longest running streak in cases won etc. He is on tubes now to sustain him but he goes on wanting to achieve more and more. And his life revolves around just winning and he doesn’t have any family.
And I guess it taught me an important lesson. That it’s really no use us achieving so many things when our heart is not right. Real values do not count and in the end, we lose out.Boyce Avenue @ The Academy
I went for Boyce Avenue’s gig at my university last Thursday!!! Can’t believe I managed to catch them live.
Justin and I are HUUUUGE fans of them since discovering them on youtube! PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE check out their renditions of lovestoned, four minutes, disturbia and apologize.
They became famous through youtube and most that turned up during the concert discovered them that way. They do great acoustic covers of famous chart toppers.
I was sooooooooooooo hypnotized the whole 1 and a half hours!! They were brilliant!!!! It was perfect!
Met this girl from Leeds while I was queuing up ( I went alone) and she managed to snag one of the Ts that Boyce Avenue threw out!!! So jealous!
So far…
So far…I am ABSOLUTELY loving it here in Manchester. I love the arts culture here. With so many musicals/concerts/theaters/art galleries to choose from. I like the fact that people in Manchester are very friendly. I like that it’s pretty cheap and accessible. Love the family church I found here that I absolutely believe in. It also has a GREAT student fellowship!
What I don’t like about Manchester….is the crowdedness and all the queues!!! Oh boy!!! Having been brought up in crowded traffic-jam prone Klang Valley….I thought I’d KNOWN what crowdedness meant. Apparently not. Manchester might not have crazy traffic jams like Klang Valley does…. but it hosts CRAZY CROWDED TRAFFIC JAMS AT SHOPPING MALLS AND SUPERMARKETS!!!! Like Seriously!!! AND THIS IS NOT EVEN LONDON!!!
Maneuvering a shopping trolley in the local supermarket (Asda) on a weekend entails great skills. Lines are incredible. You feel as if it’s Chinese New Year along the corner. And shopping in Manchester’s city centre on a weekend is also horrendous. The queues just to try on something can take FOREVER!!!! And then let’s not forget the queues to then pay for your barang-barang! I mean you would wonder if Britian is really facing one of it’s worst ever recessions.
University, with mine alone having 35 000 students (Uni of Adelaide has 16 000), queuing up (for basically everything) is part and parcel of everyday life. Which is why I always prefer to bring some reading material with me. I queue up for the bank ( you’re looking at a good 45 minutes-an hour just to talk to the manager), I queue to borrow books from the library..etc.
Anyway..enough of my rambling. Here are now MORE pictures of Manchester from my camera!
My lovely hall. LOVE the location. I live opposite the Uni gym, I’m a 5 -10 minutes walk away from my classes and 15 minutes into the CBD!!!
My window’s right at the top!
Here’s me and Tina from Beijing in my room !
That’s Yue from Shanghai and Tina . Hopefully you’ll get a good view of my messy room.
That’s Hosanna at my desk. Met her at Adelaide when the both of us were there for vacation in July! Her best friend is studying at Adelaide. Hosanna lives in Abu Dhabi now and is here to do Landscape Architecture.
My fav fruit / veg street stall!!!
The Whitworth Art Gallery near my uni.
More pictures of my Uni’s campus. Unlike the University of Adelaide, the University of Manchester is not an enclosed university campus. Think of it being still in the city with buildings all around near each other but with traffic sprawling through.
This is my school of social science building. Although I’ve never had a class there before. It was names after Arthur Lewis, a famous economist from Manchester who won a Nobel Peace Prize
This university building was named after Kilburn, the first scientist who invented the computer.
This is part of Old Trafford.
These are my flatmates! LOVE THEM TO BITSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!
Ok..I’m off now!
Manning Manchester
Can’t believe it has ALREADY been a week since I left home.
It has been a crazy week. Getting so many things done. Meeting so many people.
But I’ll just give you a fast brief run through of how things are for me right now:
- Guess who I ended up sitting beside on my flight to London??? Someone from ADELAIDE!!! An Aussie uni student who is on his way to Vienna for an exchange.
- Baggage got stuck in London and arrived two days late!
- Absolutely loving the Uni right here. I feel like I’m at the United Nations. Met people from so many different countries- Denmark, Israel, Botswana, Iran, Cyprus, Poland, India, Canada, Malawi, China, Nigeria, Iran, Pakistan, France, Bangladesh, Greece and so on. Unlike the Uni of Adelaide, not one particular race/type of group dominates. Which is great. It is really a great mix of people from all over the world.
- So far, I’m living in a hall that is in campus and a five minute walk to the city. So I’m loving the location as it is so easy to get to the city centre.
- Loving my flatmates. They are all from China but I get along really well with them. We are all postgraduate students.
- Shopping for my own groceries and so on has been quite a new adventure for me as I’ve never done that in Adelaide having lived with my sister. I have been HEAVING so much stuff the last few days from all sorts of supermarkets. And most of them are a good 20 minute walk from where I live. So I’ve finally made a good investment in a cow-print little shopping trolley which I will take a picture of and show you. It is the BEST HUMAN INVENTION!
- I really enjoy cooking for myself though it seems tedious. So far, breakfast is natural muesli with organic milk, lunch is packed sandwiches with a fruit and dinner is steak/lamb chops/pasta/whatever other main and a HUGE bowl of salad. I haven’t gotten around cooking Chinese yet but I will soon.
- Shopping here is CRAZY!!!!! Yes, I MEAN CRAZY!!! But I’ll admit, I think I prefer the Aussie fashion. (Just comparing Manchester to Adelaide) Other than clothes, things are generally pretty cheap here. Even cheaper after conversion to ringgit than Adelaide!!! All except for meat products. Fruits, vegetables, dairy, bread are ALL SO CHEAP!!!! (Relative to Adelaide)
- I also have three potted plants to keep me company at my window sill- Greek basil, coriander and british thyme. The Greek basil goes ABSOLUTELY wonderful with my salads.
- I went for a city tour under my uni orientation. We past by both the Manchester City and Manchester United stadiums! Manchester is really a historic city in terms of the industrial revolution and I realised there’s just heaps of things to explore.
- I realised that Long Distant Relationships CAN be hard. ESPECIALLY when you’re at a complete different time zone. When I’m finally free to give Justin a ring, it’s the middle of the night back in Malaysia where he is now for his sister’s wedding. *SOB SOB SOB!!!!
- Which brings me to the only downside about me being here. I’m really happy being in Manchester. But at times when I’m wondering around the streets alone or cooking by myself, I sometimes think of Justin/ my family/ my nephews- Kai and Ming, and I just COMPLETELY miss them and I get really homesick. And then I go BAH, I don’t want all this…I just want to go home or back to Adelaide and be in my comfort zone. But I guess it is normal to feel this way sometimes and I know I’m here for a reason. To continue to challenge myself to be in a new place. And I’m really glad and thankful that I’ve met great people ( ie. my flatmates) that have been great company so far.
Ok, enough of my chatters. Here are some badly captured shots of my time here so far:
My first meal upon arrival at London airport. Do NOT be deceived. It tasted horrible! It was bland, dry…urrgh.
The University of Manchester!
One of my favourite buildings of the Uni.
Fresher’s Fair is MADNESS!!! MADNESS!!!
The Hall that I’m living in right now.
Orientation was MASSIVE!
The quadrangle.
Performance at Piccadilly Square on a Friday night.
If you ever plan to come to Manchester for your studies…brace yourself for LONG queues!!! Above, I was queuing up for registration and it took me 1 hour 10 minutes! And that was considered SUPERB! Most others queued up for hours!!!
Over here, I queued up for two hours for free vaccinations. I gave up after that because I had to rush over for my city tour…and I was already right at the door!!!
The gorgeous State Library!!!!! Oh well, only NERDY me would get all excited over things like that. Libraries, I mean.
So here’s me so far. Will write more soon.
Tata.
I Seriously Think…
… God made me the female version of my father.
Anyway, am leaving for Manchester tonight. I had a brilliant 9 month break but now is time to study again, which is something I’m really excited about.
I’m a little jittery because I’m starting all over again but I guess that’s the exciting bit as well.
Two days ago, I spent the whole night brawling my eyes out because I just know that things wouldn’t be the same anymore once I leave. I mean, when I come back Dav would be off to Perth, Michelle will return to Sydney, Josh will hover over the States and my other friends, once working, wouldn’t return home for that annual summer break. Things just wouldn’t be the same. And I’d miss them. My friends, I mean. And in contrast, would have to have everyone all over the place.
And Justin wants to get his initial physiotherapy work training in Australia. Which means if I don’t want an LDR anymore I would have to return to Australia. Which is why I’ve already pre-planned this and applied for my Aussie PR. But this would mean leaving mum and dad and my friends in Msia for another few more years.
But I guess reality is, this is the situation in which we live in now in this era of globalisation. And it is something I’ve to come to terms with. Even though it means my friends and family would be a plane ride away.
But I’d have to accept that.
Life moves on.
To Elicit ‘Mouth-Waterism’
A few days ago, my sister had this crazy idea to drive all the way to Serdang from Klang, just to check out the Ramadhan bazaar there. My mum and I happily tagged along. And I managed to capture these shots.
I’m always glad to be back home around this time. =)
